Ok Ok Ok...

I received numerous '???' msn messages & emails yesterday regarding yesterday's post. For those not in the know it did come off as a bit cryptic but at the same time I have NO IDEA how to explain the man formally known as Train Wreck. I'm actually starting to think that name doesn't do him justice. He may as well be called Man with monkeys that fly out of his ass because nothing really can capture the essence of his crazy.

Yes, on Monday what started off as an innocent hello on MSN turned into a full blown psychotic episode which has yet to end. Really it is my fault. I'm the one who somehow allowed him back into my life because I have a knack of staying in touch with most of those I have dated... Sow, Shiraz, Doorman, Pylon (although that one is more because that guy is such a car accident and I can't look away). However, due to the nature surrounding my break-up (for another post another time), I never wanted to talk to him again.

So when Train Wreck resurfaced around my birthday (August) I was pretty reluctant to talk to him never mind hang out with him. But I gave in. I agreed to meet him in a public place with friends if he was so willing to suck up and to finally explain himself. I have such a boner way of wanting to believe the best in people & believe that if you care for someone you wouldn't intentionally hurt them. At least that's how I live. And he explained himself. He managed to concoct a story that was somewhat believable & managed to make me feel guilty about everything too. (nicely done).

Over the past few months. We've chatted once in a while and on occasion have hung out. I've made it clear that I only want to be friends and there would be no beneficial privileges. It also helps that when I look at him I can't help but wonder 'WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING???'

Cut to Monday... I just came home from watching 24 and finished saying goodnight to a friend when I saw Ass-Clown sign on (Ass-Clown, Ass-Face, Fucker, Train Wreck.. really any will do). I said hi. We exchanged pleasantries. I was about to get off & go to bed when he asks me "Do you remember her name?" I say "Yes, Sarah.. why who is she?" I never really have believed him.

He informs me that it was his ex's best friend.... awesome. You were cheating on me. After a couple of back & forths, I block him. So He starts phoning.. and phoning... and phoning.....

He phoned me 34 times within one hour. The only reason I didn't turn my phone off was because I wanted to log his calls to show police in case he stepped up the crazy. When he started texting too, I mentioned that to him "Who's the psycho? You've called me over 30 times" .

In case you're wondering, I apparently pick up on the 35th ring. We talk (ok screaming match.... apparently I've angered him) and he explains to me that he had no choice but to lie to me knowing I would freak out (so it's my fault?) and that if I knew what caring about people was I'd help him (but you cheated on me..... more then once too) and that his ex is making a big mistake by moving in with this girl (because what other people I've never met has such an impact on my life) Basically it was pointed out to me that him waking up Sunday morning with that girl wasn't his fault as he was drunk and doesn't know what was going on (and apparently pathetic)

So I'm dealing with someone who has the inability to take responsibility for themselves and for whatever reason I'm supposed to phone a random girl & explain to her that the reason I dumped him is because I caught him with her best friend... Yea, I'm really eager to have THAT conversation. However, I agreed to it Monday so I could go to bed.

I've deleted him from my phone & set my incoming calls to only accept my contact list. I know I've received two voice mails and a text yesterday and a text today. Both texts ask "Why are you ignoring me?" but I have no idea how many times he's called. To me it reeks of weird, pathetic, desperate and f*cked. If that's not the behavior of an addict, I don't know what is. Sorry I can't help you there Train Wreck... guess I lied.